


Nothing Worsens, Nothing Grows

by Baekbitficfest



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Depression, M/M, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-05-12
Packaged: 2018-10-30 13:35:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10877853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baekbitficfest/pseuds/Baekbitficfest
Summary: It’s the sort of moment Baekhyun wants to bottle up and keep forever, something as soft and rare as this --Kyungsoo’s fingers resting delicately at the junction of Baekhyun’s neck and shoulder, his eyes full and warm and bittersweet, cheeks still pink from dancing all morning, day, and night. But Baekhyun has always been selfish in the strangest of ways; it’s not the only part of Kyungsoo he wants to keep to himself.





	Nothing Worsens, Nothing Grows

**Author's Note:**

> Be sure to leave some lovely comments for the writer!
> 
> Thank you for reading <3

_**Prompt #** : 94_

_**Title** : nothing worsens, nothing grows_

_**Pairing** : Baekhyun/D.O_

_**Rating** : G_

_**Word count** : 4.1k_

_**Summary** : It’s the sort of moment Baekhyun wants to bottle up and keep forever, something as soft and rare as this --Kyungsoo’s fingers resting delicately at the junction of Baekhyun’s neck and shoulder, his eyes full and warm and bittersweet, cheeks still pink from dancing all morning, day, and night. But Baekhyun has always been selfish in the strangest of ways; it’s not the only part of Kyungsoo he wants to keep to himself._

_**Warnings** : mentions of depression and self-harm_

_**Author's Note** : sorry that this probably isn’t what the prompter wanted, or any good at all. ah well. _

 

“Baekhyun,” says a familiar voice, and Baekhyun cracks an eye open to see Kyungsoo leaning over him, frowning disapprovingly. “Up.”

Baekhyun hums in acknowledgement, but makes no moves to push himself off the floor, still exhausted from dancing for concert rehearsals all afternoon --still exhausted from everything else around him, too.  

“Nah,” he says instead, reaching up to wrap his fingers around Kyungsoo’s wrist. “ _ Down _ .”

In one swift motion --with as much strength as possible-- Baekhyun pulls an extremely disgruntled Kyungsoo down onto the ground with him, holding him against his chest by wrapping Kyungsoo in his arms and laughing as he  _ squirms _ .

“Let. Go. Of. Me.” Kyungsoo grits out, writhing like a cat in a bathtub, but Baekhyun’s strength is weak and his want to get docked in the chin is even weaker so he relents, still laughing as Kyungsoo rolls himself off of Baekhyun’s chest and sits beside him, disgruntled.

“The ground is nice, Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun drawls, spraying his arms out haphazardly and tilting his chin to the sky. “Learn to appreciate the finer things in life.”

What Baekhyun has come to expect these days, between them, is the way Kyungsoo watches him in silence for a few seconds, gaze heavy and encrypted with a thousand things Baekhyun doesn’t know how to decipher. 

What he  _ hasn’t  _ come to expect, however, is the way Kyungsoo sighs and surrenders, leaning backwards until his head hits the concrete and squinting at the clouds.

“My ass hurts,” Kyungsoo comments brusquely, and Baekhyun can’t help himself from bursting into laughter, caught off-guard by how  _ cute  _ Kyungsoo can be, sometimes --he idly wonders how many fans would pay big money, just to see him like this, and his stomach clenches. “I don’t see the appeal.” Once Baekhyun manages to regain his breath, sides practically  _ aching _ , Kyungsoo is looking at him with this strange sort of smile on his face, and Baekhyun’s not sure if he doesn’t  _ know  _ what it means, or if he doesn’t  _ want  _ to.

“What?” He asks, biting his lip. Kyungsoo shakes his head --or at least, as proficiently as someone lying on the floor can.

“Nothing,” he mumbles, and his eyes flick back up to the sky, squinting contemplatively. Kyungsoo chews on his cheek then, in that way that he always does when he’s trying to figure out what to say --for all that Kyungsoo is careful and composed, it only comes through hand-picked words and short-phrased sentences, delicate in their application to preserve as much energy as possible. Conversations with Kyungsoo these days feels like they’re  _ both  _ treading on thin ice, though, too stubborn --in Baekhyun’s case-- and too cautious --in Kyungsoo’s case-- to acknowledge the cracking beneath their feet. “I was looking for you.”

Baekhyun swallows at that, around all the little things caught in his throat, and as he watches Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo just watches back, waiting, impassive.

“I was overwhelmed,” Baekhyun admits, spreading his arms out just that little bit further on the roof of their hotel building, fairly certain that it’s meant to be off limits to guests but not really caring. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Kyungsoo replies, softly. “We just-- we couldn’t find you, we… we were worried.”

After flying to Tokyo yesterday Baekhyun had switched his phone to aeroplane mode and hadn’t found a reason to turn it off again. Something about all the notifications blinking up at him had felt smothering, and the more people expect from Baekhyun, the less he feels like he has to give.

It’s akin to somewhat living in a glass tank --everyday the water rises just that much higher, and yet no one on the outside seems to notice he’s drowning, expecting him to continue breathing all the same. Baekhyun’s sinking through the depths, senses dulling, lungs filling, but it feels like the light doesn't even reach him, these days. Which is stupid, because isn't that meant to be his power? Not even in the embarrassment-filled era that is MAMA, but in general --he’s Byun Baekhyun, local beagle, mood-maker, and general all-round feels good vibe deliverer; the team can’t afford a lead vocalist that’s too exhausted to try, and neither can the rest of the world.

The beginning of each day provides a battle in which Baekhyun forces himself to get out of bed, and yet no one  _ truly _ cares beyond what he delivers as an EXO member --even Baekhyun himself, is caught in a catch twenty-two of self-loathing that stems from his self-pity, hating himself on repeat for his own pity and pitying himself for his own hatred. The fact of the matter is that no matter what Baekhyun does, it will never be  _ enough  _ \--not just for fans, but for  _ everyone--  _ and it’s impossible to pity him when there are millions out there doing better and trying harder in worse conditions, suffering far more than he is.

Which is exactly how Baekhyun has quickly become accustom to wearing a mask.

Yet somehow Kyungsoo always sees through him --always has, and always will. It makes Baekhyun shiver when he meets the way Kyungsoo gazes through him, but it’s not necessarily in a bad way.

“I’m sorry,” Baekhyun apologises again, quietly. “It’s just-- it’s hard.”

“I know,” Kyungsoo says, even though he kind of doesn’t. Some days Baekhyun wakes up and it feels like even existing is just a little too much effort, every person that even bothers to look at him causing his heart to speed up in his chest, his throat to tighten, the need to find an open space too definite. It’s funny, somehow, that Baekhyun functions so well on top of it, in hindsight, as his mind sickens and tries to destroy itself Baekhyun continues smiling and carrying on, being EXO’s light as per usual, and nobody notices a thing out of place. (Not that he’d  _ want _ them to, anyway.) “I worry about you.”

“I can’t believe this,” Baekhyun gasps affronted, sitting up. “Do Kyungsoo, EXO’s ice queen, is actually worried about  _ me _ ?” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, although his lips are quirked upwards, raising himself until he’s leaning on his palms. Baekhyun fumbles to reach for his phone, swiping open to the camera app and setting it to  _ video.  _ “Now just say it again and I’ll record it for the world to see.  _ Caring  _ Do Kyungsoo: EXO’s Local Cryptid-- mmph.”

Kyungsoo has his hand clamped around Baekhyun’s mouth, frowning. “You’re insufferable.”

Naturally, Baekhyun licks it, Kyungsoo drawing back with a grimace. “You like me anyway.”

“Unfortunately,” he says, and Baekhyun can’t help himself from grinning, looking at the way Kyungsoo wrinkles his nose. “But I still worry.” he continues, glancing sideways as he places a reassuring hand on Baekhyun’s shoulder, and at the weight of it Baekhyun is forced to look away, closing his eyes to the clouds that dot the sky as a breeze blows past.

“You’ve worked hard recently,” Kyungsoo mumbles, and when Baekhyun dares to open his eyes again Kyungsoo is watching him, hesitant. It’s the sort of moment Baekhyun wants to bottle up and keep forever, something as soft and rare as this --Kyungsoo’s fingers resting delicately at the junction of Baekhyun’s neck and shoulder, his eyes full and warm and  _ bittersweet _ , cheeks still pink from dancing all morning, day and night-- but Baekhyun has always been selfish in the strangest of ways; it’s not the only part of Kyungsoo he wants to keep to himself. As if reading his mind, Kyungsoo’s eyes soften, and he says, “But today isn’t over yet, Baekhyunnie.”

It’s an apology as much as it is a reassurance, and it is  _ not  _ the sort of thing that should have Baekhyun swallowing back tears, but he does anyway,  _ you’ve worked hard  _ persisting through his mind like the beat of a song he can’t unlearn. Worthlessness is a common acquaintance in an industry like this, and the idea that even one person, just one, might not see Baekhyun as such, brings a well of mixed paint emotions springing forth in his chest, churning together to make a muddy brown. It’s validation as much as it is self-indulgent, but recognition from the people who count the most really just makes Baekhyun…  _ feel _ .

Baekhyun sighs dramatically, falling back onto the ground with a soft thump, and mutters, “Life is so overwhelming.”

Kyungsoo laughs quietly, and reaches out, brushing the strands of hair from Baekhyun’s eyes and forcing him to slip his eyelids shut, leaning into the touch. “So melodramatic,” he mutters, and rubs his thumb lightly just below Baekhyun’s hairline, Baekhyun sighing through his nose.

“Do you think it will ever get easier?” Baekhyun asks, suddenly, and when he looks again Kyungsoo is frozen, staring at him. “Or does it just get progressively harder the older you get?”

Kyungsoo’s eyebrows draw together, frowning. “Does what get easier?”

Baekhyun laughs --maybe a little too harshly, too grating, unable to reel it back. “Existing,” he supplies, shuffling onto his elbows. “Life, the universe, and everything~” he hums. “I mean, what’s the point in playing a game on hard mode if you never get the satisfaction of beating it?”

Kyungsoo’s eyes widen, but only before he snaps, “Don’t think like that.” Baekhyun blinks at him, startled by the sudden anger. “Don’t treat life like a series of checkpoints because it’s not. That’s the quickest way to give up, Baekhyun.”

“I wouldn’t--” Baekhyun breathes in harshly, and he’s almost _offended_ , somehow, feeling accused at the end of Kyungsoo’s pointed outrage. “I would _never_ do something like _that_ , Kyungsoo,” he says, voice lower than usual. “ _Trust_ _me_.”

Because that’s where it hurts most, Baekhyun realises, the idea that Kyungsoo sees him as something untrustworthy and broken, something that’s so  _ off the wire  _ that it can’t even take care of itself--

“I do,” Kyungsoo replies, and just like that the anger dissipates, fades away to a dull throb in the flatline heartbeat of the rest of Baekhyun’s emotions, smothered beneath the surface of water and far-off, somehow, distant and packed away, like old boxes in an attic that Baekhyun only opens in moments of vulnerability and nostalgia. Kyungsoo’s always had that effect over people, somehow, though, the soothing, calming ability that comes with being someone who cares about others before themselves. It’s an admirable quality if Baekhyun’s ever seen one, but it’s not something they share; Kyungsoo will always put his friends, his family, his  _ team  _ before all else, and Baekhyun will always resign himself to a life of wanting  _ more _ . “But you’re… You’re sick, Baekhyun. That thing inside you…  _ that’s  _ what I don’t trust.”

“There’s nothing wrong with me,” Baekhyun snaps, turning away and pulling his knees to his chest, hating himself for his openness. To separate Baekhyun from his own misery is to give it shape and form; but it doesn't have one,  _ shouldn't _ have one, because that makes it tangible --makes it a  _ problem _ .

“I never said there was,” Kyungsoo replies, gently, and the hand on Baekhyun’s back has him relaxing, muscles slumping. “You’re just... hurting. Sick and hurting.”

Baekhyun scoffs out a laugh, but he can’t meet Kyungsoo’s eyes. “Maybe it’s always been a part of me,” he says, and looks down at his hands, where the skin around his nails had been picked until they’d bled. It had been strange, at the time, because Baekhyun had just kept picking and picking, watching as his fingertips bled, and yet he hadn’t felt a thing.

(Which should be more worrying than it is, really, but the dissolving feeling of  _ numb  _ is a common acquaintance --and Baekhyun  _ knows  _ he should do something to fix it, but the problem is that he doesn’t really  _ feel  _ like he cares enough to; doesn’t feel  _ full stop  _ .)

“Maybe it’s always been a part of me,” he repeats, and wonders if he can remember a time when it wasn’t. Memories of before are fuddled and blurred and somehow the loneliness inside Baekhyun’s chest had never really gone away, only fluctuated, soothed over by the eleven teammates at his side --or, well, eight, these days. There’s no clean cut line between  _ happiness  _ and  _  now  _ and Baekhyun doesn’t even know if the former had ever existed to begin with, or how he should even begin to label the latter. “Maybe you just got better at seeing it.”

Kyungsoo shakes his head slightly, but the lines around his eyes soften. “Maybe you just got worse at hiding it.”

Baekhyun looks at Kyungsoo, and it’s like all six years worth of sleep deprivation catch up on him as he truly, entirely feels  _ exhausted. _ Baekhyun wants time to stop in this moment just so he can pause to breathe, but it will always keep moving, and that’s just something he has to deal with. There’s a hole in his chest that somehow manages to feel full and empty all at once and it’s making things bubble in the back of Baekhyun’s throat, eyes stinging as he bites into his lower lip and  _ laughs _ .

“I guess I’m slipping, huh?” He jokes, and desperately swipes at his eyes with the heels of his palms, because crying before a big concert is one thing but crying out here, in front of Kyungsoo, is another thing entirely. Feelings of vulnerability aren’t particularly fun in a lifestyle the ensures Baekhyun has to keep it all to himself, but if there’s anyone in his life he trusts, it’s Kyungsoo. Some days it’s worse, some days it’s better, but all in all the longer Baekhyun has to deal with it, it only seems to grow, swallowing his chest whole and drowning him. “I should do better.”

“Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo says, and there’s something tense and thick caught in his throat, squeezing his voice. “You don’t have to do everything alone.”

But Baekhyun kind of does, because that’s exactly how this works. Even if he wasn’t an idol with a thousand expectations thrust upon him he’s still  _ Korean; _ something like this is a blemish, a mark upon his otherwise seeming perfection, a  _ stain _ , a falsity, an excuse to feel justified in his own self-inflicted misery. Everything in Baekhyun’s life belongs to everyone else and no one wants to own something that’s broken --he’s a god put upon somebody else’s pedestal and gods  _ do not bleed _ .

But even beyond that he has to do everything himself because he’s  _ Baekhyun _ , because he’s the person who knows everyone’s name and high-fives every person in the hallway but can still feel lonely in a room filled with friends. Solitude isn't familiar so much as it is constant; like a shadow Baekhyun can only rid himself of by plunging into darkness entirely. Baekhyun has to handle everything himself because he doesn’t know how else he could possibly do it --reliability creates weakness and everyone will always disappoint, in the end; either them or Baekhyun, at least.

Besides, he’s not the first idol to be in this position, and he certainly won’t be the last. Everyone has their shadows and their demons, clipped and manicured to only come out at the right angle that no camera will ever catch. The weight on Junmyeon’s shoulders, the way Minseok picks at his food rather than eating it, the shadows beneath Chanyeol’s eyes when he doesn’t smile… they all have their own skeletons, and nobody needs someone else’s filling their already-full closets.

“Of course I do,” Baekhyun replies, and tucks into himself just that little bit further, eyes dropped to the ground, because these are  _ Baekhyun’s  _ demons and he can’t just go logging them off onto someone who doesn’t want them to begin with. “Letting other people handle your problems is selfish.”

“It’s not selfish to want to be cared about Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo adds sternly, and when Baekhyun glances up at him he’s watching Baekhyun as he shuffles forward with that mix of expressions again, the ones that Baekhyun doesn’t know what to do with. “It’s not selfish to want a break.”

And through it all that’s what it comes down to; selfishness, because Baekhyun will always want what he can never have; a break, a happy-ending, a life of his own, the ability to feel cared about, to be surrounded by people chanting his name and not feel  _ alone _ .

But at the same time, he doesn't feel alone, because... because Kyungsoo is with him, because Baekhyun and Kyungsoo fit against each other like two puzzle pieces that had never been seperate to begin with, because Kyungsoo doesn't treat Baekhyun like he's any different from anyone else, doesn't tip-toe even if the ground is cracking. They're close, the two of them, and they always have been, but unsurprisingly, it has never been  _ enough _ .

“Is it selfish to want?” Baekhyun asks, licking his lips.  _ Want you, want us, want this,  _ years and years and years in the making, balanced precariously on cracking ice but never simply  _ plunging _ .

Kyungsoo swallows. “No,” he says, voice thick. “It isn’t.”

Baekhyun opens his mouth, but closes it, because they both know it’s more complicated than the simplicity of  _ want _ , even if he stubbornly tells himself otherwise. Living each day as a dedication to thousands of others means Baekhyun resigns himself to a life of selfishness, but there’s just too much at risk here, between them, even behind doors, for the team and for each other --yet still Baekhyun finds himself leaning forward, unable to resist.

Kyungsoo however, voice of reason and solid rock in Baekhyun’s otherwise tumultuous existence, knows better, and draws back, shaking his head. It’s neither the place nor the time for something like this, Baekhyun knows, but the true problem is that that  _ always  _ seems to be the case.

(Whenever Baekhyun  _ does  _ acknowledge whatever lies between them, Kyungsoo curls into himself, defensive, and Baekhyun is always left wondering how he’s meant to close over that gap. It’s obvious that they both  _ want  _ something, but Baekhyun’s the only one selfish enough to actually reach for it.)

“Sorry,” Baekhyun apologises, for nothing, and feels the wall once broken between them build up again, brick by brick, leaving him all alone on the other side. “But... thank you,” he says. “For today.” It’s not as verbose or eloquent as Baekhyun would like to try and describe the way Kyungsoo makes things  _ better _ , just by being around, but it’s a start. “And I… I’m sorry. For making you worry.”

“I’ll always worry about you,” Kyungsoo says simply, lips curled upwards. “That’s kind of my job.”

“Tell that to Junmyeon-hyung,” Baekhyun jokes, and Kyungsoo laughs lightly, brushing the gravel off his palms. Baekhyun’s always liked making people smile --it makes everything else just that little bit easier for him, too. Kyungsoo's heart-shaped grin especially.

“Acknowledging it is a good thing, Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo says, a non sequitur that has Baekhyun blinking at him, feeling lost. “Talking about things is good. Not shouldering everything alone is  _ good _ .”

Baekhyun laughs quietly at his eloquence, and Kyungsoo pulls a face. “It’s strange, though,” Baekhyun comments, and stretches out his hand, splaying his fingers in all their broken-skin glory. “That I feel selfish when I share.”

But at the same time, it doesn't feel selfish, because it's  _ Kyungsoo _ . Kyungsoo, who operates on the same wavelength as Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, who has always been there, ever since day one, Kyungsoo, who Baekhyun ineffectually and whole heartedly--

“I understand,” Kyungsoo says, and maybe he actually kind of does. “But selfishness is good too, Baekhyun.” He pauses, and Baekhyun can see the way Kyungsoo hand picks every single word, smiling to himself at the thought. “Because it’s the only way we can look after ourselves.”

Baekhyun scoffs. “As if  _ you  _ know how to be selfish,” he jokes lightly, but Kyungsoo just makes a soured face again, wrinkling his nose.

“I’m always selfish,” Kyungsoo says, and Baekhyun is all too aware of the way Kyungsoo looks at him, at the way their thighs are pressed together,  _ burning _ , melting all the ice beneath their feet. He swallows. “I’m being selfish right now.”

Hesitantly,  _ reluctant _ , Kyungsoo’s hand lightly touches Baekhyun’s cheek, a reassuring brush of fingertips against skin, nothing more, but Baekhyun clasps onto his wrist desperately, leaning into the touch. The words  _ Kyungsoo _ and  _ selfish _ barely even belong in the same sentence, but Baekhyun feels the air between them shift, and it's that time again, where the ice is cracking but neither of them are doing anything about it --any quick movements might cause it to break, but if they simply stand still, well, then they're stuck, aren't they? Everything between them feels so  _ full _ , on top of the emptiness in Baekhyun's chest, and maybe it's not perfect, but... but Baekhyun  _ wants _ , he wants and wants and he's  _ sick _ of it; sick of wanting, sick of waiting, sick of letting everything in his life merely pass by because he's too tired to do anything else about it. If Baekhyun is greedy for wanting Kyungsoo despite their position, their careers, their lives,  _ them _ , then he has long since passed the point of caring, years and years ago.

“Then let's both be selfish, Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun mumbles, and kisses Kyungsoo before he can do anything otherwise.

It’s nothing much, just a light press of lips, but it’s enough to have Kyungsoo pulling back, putting all the distance between them as he scrambles, stumbling.

“No Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo says. “ _ No _ . You can’t-- You can't have a  _ mental breakdown _ and just-- just--”

Baekhyun laughs, because it's not as if he's  _ drunk _ \--although considering he just kissed Kyungsoo, he's not exactly thinking  _ straight _ . Still, Baekhyun understands the position he's accidentally put Kyungsoo into, and the guilt rolls over in his gut.

Baekhyun sighs. “This thing with me, Kyungsoo,” he explains, and tries to ignore the way rejection swirls bitterly in the back of his throat, pushing it down because  _ now is not the time _ . “And this thing with  _ you _ . They’re not… I mean. They’re mutually exclusive. You  _ know  _ they always have been.”

Because there may be no line between  _ happiness _ and  _ now  _ but there is a line between Kyungsoo and Baekhyun, a  _ before _ and  _ after _ , a time before all the air between them thickened and they became each other’s pillars without ever meaning to and all the time that came after. Baekhyun doesn’t care about the fans or the country or the team or anything else, Baekhyun is  _ tired _ , and he just wants to be allowed to be selfish; just this once. He can see the hesitance in Kyungsoo's face, and he knows exactly why it's there.

“You can't fix me, Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun continues, after inhaling a shuddering breath. Kyungsoo only searches his face, but Baekhyun doesn’t know if he finds what he’s looking for. “Because I'm not broken to begin with.” He says, and raises his chin up, stubbornly. “I know  _ that _ , Kyungsoo. It doesn't mean that I like having you around any less, and it doesn’t-- it doesn’t change the way I feel. It doesn't mean we can't... we can't at least  _ try _ .”

Kyungsoo sighs, and shakes his head, giving a quiet, reluctant laugh.

“You have the  _ worst  _ timing in the world, Byun Baekhyun,” he says, and smiles softly. “But maybe…” he swallows. “Maybe later, we can both start being a little more selfish.”

Baekhyun’s lip twitches, and he asks, “How long is  _ later _ ? I’m not a patient person--”

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, cutting Baekhyun off. “Don’t I know it,” he mumbles. “But once you feel less overwhelmed, and you’ve actually  _ thought  _ about it--” Kyungsoo says, as if Baekhyun hasn’t been thinking about this for  _ years _ . “-- _ Properly _ . Then… then we can talk about it.”

Baekhyun smiles, and self-indulgently presses a kiss to the corner of Kyungsoo’s mouth, laughing as Kyungsoo just pushes him away, leaning back onto the concrete with a sigh. There's a lot to be discussed, Baekhyun knows, but he's glad he selfishly took this one moment --even if he  _ definitely _ shouldn't have.

“I’m tired,” Baekhyun whines, childish, and pouts, ignoring the way Kyungsoo flinches, tenses, eventually relaxing. Just like walking on ice, Kyungsoo has also become unpredictable these days; Baekhyun never knows which step will result in drowning, and which step will result in something much, much worse.

But, at the very least, they're finally moving across it.

Swallowing, Kyungsoo quickly pulls away and stands suddenly, brushing down non-existent creases in his pants, and offers out a hand.

“Let’s go back,” Kyungsoo says, and smiles reassuringly. “The others will be worried.”

Sighing, Baekhyun reaches out and lets Kyungsoo haul him to his feet. Today might not be over, but there’s a hidden, selfish part of Baekhyun that kind of wishes it was, just to get it over and done with --and another part of him that wishes it never will be, so that he could stay like this with Kyungsoo on the rooftop, just to catch his breath relish in that little bit of  _ hope _ .

Baekhyun’s not sure of which option he wants more.


End file.
